Minneapolis, Minnesota — ICBTS News “Before We Could Even Get It Out of the Crate” While pursuing a “time of reflection” at home in response to the Leeann Tweeden sex scandal, Senator Franken sustained a nasty injury to his left eye after attempting to sample the wares of a sex robot provided to the senator free..
Washington, DC — ICBTS News At a press conference this morning, Senate Majority leader Mitch McConnell revealed personal, first hand knowledge of Judge Roy Moore dating indiscretions taking place more than 40 years ago. Appearing next to famed feminist attorney, Gloria Allred, McConnell revealed that he could confirm inappropriate behavior on the part of Judge..
Mobile, AL – ICBTS News In the ongoing Roy Moore story, unnamed reporters at the Washington Post and the New York Times have told ICBTS News that, in addition to mounting evidence that heterosexual males do exist in Alabama, an even more alarming trend is affecting the Alabama election: male heterosexual thoughts. Long completely dormant..
Mobile, AL — ICBTS News In the wake of the Roy Moore story that took four decades to break, the Washington Post has discovered peripheral evidence of more problems in the Alabama senate race. It is becoming apparent that multiple women have come forward with evidence that heterosexual males do exist among Alabama voters. One..
Wilmington, Delaware – ICBTS News At a small press conference in a long time family residence, former Vice President Joe Biden wiped away a tear as he took in the sight of a long hallway full of bronze wildlife statuary. “It’s been a lifetime of commissioning these beauties,” Biden said. “I had to find the..
Provincetown, MA — ICBTS News A fatigued but hopeful Kevin Spacey inspected work on a series of bunk houses in this beach resort town recently, during a break in the production of “House of Cards.” The 58 year old award winning actor has found time recently to review progress on a project very close to..
Kensington Palace – ICBTS News Baby reveal parties have earned a new spot in social calendars across the globe, along with coed showers and bachelor parties, but they usually don’t include free tubal ligation procedures paid for by a prince. All of that changed when Prince William, second in line to the British throne, gave..
New York, NY — ICBTS News In the wake of yet another act of Islamic extremist terror, New York Mayor Bill de Blasio has proposed a new addition to New York public school education — surrender studies. “Look,” said the mayor, under the weight of heavy questioning at a recent press conference, “I’m convinced we..
Casper, Wyoming ICBTS News Need Money for Hungry Children? Consider U-235 Tracking down wealthy benefactors was once pretty tiring work for Tim Ashley of Universal Village Pantry, an organization dedicated to feeding impoverished children in the third world. “People think when you have a good cause, the money just pours in, but it’s not that..
Miami, Florida — ICBTS News Forget somber dark grays and deep blacks — and start thinking canary yellow or “fruit-pop purple.” Fresh off her altercation with President Trump and General Kelly over remarks made by the president to a grieving widow, Congresswoman Frederica Wilson (D-Florida) has announced she will be teaching a course on proper..