Tag: Satire

Adam Schiff Claims Trump Commanded North Korean Death Camp

Washington, DC — ICBTS News Congressional Intelligence Committee Chair, Adam Schiff (D-California), is planning to present dramatic testimony this week alleging that President Donald Trump personally commanded a North Korean death camp. A confidential source within the Congressman’s office refused to name the source of this new revelation but hinted, strongly, that it’s clear from..

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New Study Unable to Locate White Nationalists

Madison, WI – ICBTS News In response to public fear of growing “white nationalism” expressed by organizations as diverse as the National Education Association, NPR, The Southern Poverty Law Center, and the Queer Socialist Workers Party, researchers at Hollick University set out to identify both a definition for “White Nationalism” and where it might be gaining..

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Joe Biden Leaves on “International Shakedown” Tour

McLean, VA —  ICBTS News Presidential Candidate and former VP Joe Biden announced yesterday he will be leaving this week on what he is boldly calling an “International Shakedown Tour.” “It’s a sad reality, but in politics, you need to raise the bucks,” Biden said, “and I’ve found a fun and efficient way to do..

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Ocasio-Cortez: College Bribe Funding Is A Human Right

Washington, DC • ICBTS News In the wake of federal indictments against powerful industry titans and celebrities who have been accused of gaining their children’s elite college admission through bribery, Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has weighed in on the side of more bribe funding. “Why,” asked the congresswoman, “should only the rich and powerful have a Stanford..

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Bill Kristol Sets Sights on 2020 Presidential Run

Georgetown, Washington, DC • ICBTS News At the posh Newman-George Badminton Club, Bill Kristol, the former editor of the Weekly Standard, announced his intention to run for the GOP Presidential nomination in 2020. “Should I secure the nomination,” Kristol said to at least two dozen club members taking high tea, “it’s very likely that a dynamic..

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“Hebrew Roots” Woman Goes Full Eden

Mesa, Arizona • ICTBS News Arlyce Simms, 63, now out on bail after her 2nd public nudity arrest, insists on being called “Chava,” (Hebrew for “Eve”) in homage to the Creation story recorded in Genesis, the first book of the Bible. “I had been protesting that horrible homage to pagan idolatry, Christmas, at a local mall,”..

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“Boob Grope” Support Group Formed

Madison, WI – ICBTS News In the wake of thousands of sexual harassment claims made by women against men in political and media circles, a group of male professors at Hollick University are coming forward, anonymously for now, against women who abuse greetings, “side hugs” and in some cases the full frontal, lingering embrace. “It’s..

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