New York, NY • ICBTS News

Fresh from a racial-reconciliation feet washing ceremony, Utah Senator Mitt Romney has upped the stakes in the effort to achieve race-reconciliation and race-forgiveness: free bunion surgery.

“I was washing the feet of several African American ministers,” Mitt said, “and I couldn’t help noticing a few of them were suffering from terrible bunions, so as soon as I dried my hands, I put them in touch with my own personal orthopedic surgeon, B. Hyrum Sorenson of the University of Utah medical faculty.   I’ve offered to pay for their flight, surgery, and post surgery care.”

“I can’t help thinking,” Mitt observed, “that ‘wokeness’ has ever expanding levels of awareness.  And bunions, because they’re hidden, are probably not considered very much in the whole effort to achieve racial justice.  We need to bridge the bunion divide.”

When contacted by ICBTS News, Dr. Sorenson confirmed that everything had been arranged, but that, due to Covid concerns, the surgeries would likely be put off indefinitely.