Columbus, OH • ICBTS News

In a development social network engineers are worried about, an Ohio construction manager, Tim Tedesco, was recently identified as a news and blog reader who goes beyond the Open Graph description property, clicks the link, and—even more concerning—reads the entire article. Using sophisticated scroll-bar analysis, Tedesco’s account was flagged as a social network consumer who reserves judgment, “social network rage,” and even emoji use until he reads the articles and gives every appearance of contemplating it.

“We called him,” said an unnamed source at a huge social network company, “because we couldn’t believe what the analytics appeared to be saying.  It turns out he actually reads the article and many times even re-reads it, long before deciding to share or make a comment.”

Most social network engines, of course, prefer to keep the consumer locked within their site, reading their ads, and interacting only with other consumers on their platform.

“People talk about click-bait a lot,” said one source, “but the trick is to leave the user in a stage of rage, amusement, resentment or arousal, without actually leaving our social network platform. That’s why we infinitely prefer ads that just take you to another place in our little world.  We don’t even like people talking to each other or emailing each other outside the platform.”

Tedesco was surprised by the level of attention his behavior has earned. “I like to read and think about things,” he told a group of reporters. “I even check sources.”