Tag: Satire

John Kasich Hoping to be Knock-Out Victim

DILLON, SC — ICBTS News Presidential candidate and Ohio governor John Kasich found himself wandering  a dangerous South Carolina neighborhood last week, looking for someone to knock him out cold — literally. “I’m behind the curve on this,” he told reporters, “this expression of young urban identity– this knock out game where distressed young kids..

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Pope Seeking I Love Lucy “Fred Mertz” Look

VATICAN (ICBTS News) Highly placed confidential sources close to Pope Francis may help explain the recent trip and fall incidents plaguing the holy father.  He is apparently experiencing a great deal of fatigue from cosmetic surgery designed to make him look more like 1950s television star William Frawley who played the character Fred Mertz in I..

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Shut Up, For Your Own Good…

Being Absolutely Quiet is the Best Thing For You, (And Us..) I need to say a few words about our founder, Felix Perringdale. The 1893 photograph of Perringdale is widely misunderstood, and scandalously misrepresented by his detractors.  Over the course of three years, Perringdale repaired to his parents’ barn in Le Mars, Iowa, where–surrounded by..

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Tech Firms Buying Up Mega-Churches

iChurch? There’s a new gold rush on in California, and it comes with its own praise music.  According to confidential industry insiders, three of Silicon Valley’s biggest technology firms are in bidding wars to buy up the nation’s largest churches. “Not many pastors are truly entertaining,” said a stock market analyst close to the acquisition..

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